A Life of Wonder

The incredible power of three words.

Select three words for how you describe yourself and find 3 more of how others describe you.

Then, ask them.

Notice the differences between self perception and group perception. This sounds like such a simple exercise, and yet its implications are profound.

You may have heard of the company What3Words, which maps the earth using words as coordinates, enabling hard to find places to be easily discoverable. 

The same concept, three words, both used to help you find yourself. 

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Tonight I spoke with a truly wise man, a man with a keen sense of humor who believes that the soul wears many bodies and when we die, we shed our body like a change of clothing.

This man introduced me to new ways of mediating and the power of doing so for 20 minutes daily.

The beauty of his words were magnified by the fact that he lives in the world: the world of business, of Zoom, of hustle, and yet integrates his mindful practices into daily life. I shared my passion for community with him, and he reminded me that community lives inside me.

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“The earth laughs in flowers.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Laughter cuts through the dark fog, the heaviness, the forest with no light.

It diminishes problems, changes perspectives, and gives fruit to fruitless, undulating trees. 

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Comfort is taking

a part the betamax with my father watching 

and picking blackberries in the Seattle summer

it’s walking while listening to podcasts–somewhere near water 

It’s plants after the rain, hot tea, and slow time

friends who get the joke and remember when

and sleeping in, and driving anywhere with music aimlessly 

it’s the times we’ve shared, the life we’ve shared

how it grows between us, protecting, loving, inviting

It’s the softness of shared sleep, your predictable laugh

caused my a favorite show 

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I’m wired to take immediate action. It’s also what I value. I often respond to emails within minutes. If something requires attention, urgency, I’m on it. There’s a rush I feel, a clarity, from the emergent. However, it’s no way to live. There are decisions where immediate reactions undermine the clarity of thought and perspective.

When major changes happen, or events which are dramatic and transformative in nature, immediacy is the enemy of clear thinking. I’m learning, albeit very slowly, that for many of the most important decisions the best course of action is to toss them to the back of the mind where space and time provide depth and clarity, where the sharp edges of shocking news and big change can be smoothed like rocks in a tumbler.

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“Perhaps the most “spiritual” thing any of us can do is simply to look through our own eyes, see with eyes of wholeness, and act with integrity and kindness.”
― Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life

“Meditation is the only intentional, systematic human activity which at bottom is about not trying to improve yourself or get anywhere else, but simply to realize where you already are.”
― Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are

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As simple as it sounds, slowing down is one of the best ways to destress. That which seem emergent, often isn’t, and there’s a great difference between highly important and time critical.

I want to resolve to bring slowness, as a tool, into decision making, to remind myself, through my actions, of the spacious choices that are in front of me, if I can let them unfold without forcing them to.

Of course, there’s a place for swiftness, boldness, and urgent action, but if it’s not needed, best to use calm.

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“TO BE HOPEFUL in bad times is not just foolishly romantic. It is based on the fact that human history is a history not only of cruelty, but also of compassion, sacrifice, courage, kindness.

What we choose to emphasize in this complex history will determine our lives. If we see only the worst, it destroys our capacity to do something. If we remember those times and places—and there are so many—where people have behaved magnificently, this gives us the energy to act, and at least the possibility of sending this spinning top of a world in a different direction.

And if we do act, in however small a way, we don’t have to wait for some grand utopian future. The future is an infinite succession of presents, and to live now as we think human beings should live, in defiance of all that is bad around us, is itself a marvelous victory.”

― Howard Zinn

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Rituals protect us. We step in & out of them to receive information and open a part of ourselves otherwise inaccessible. They connect us to something greater. They allow us to relax our conscious mind and rest into practices which hold us. We often forget that we can design our own rituals. Unlike ceremonies, which are performed for occasions, we evoke rituals for their symbolic power. 

What rituals do you practice which are not also ceremonies?

Elevate the mundane with ritual by bringing intention and symbolism to it. Even the act of boiling water can create ritual and move from a task to a sacred gesture. 

“A ritual is the enactment of a myth. And, by participating in the ritual, you are participating in the myth. And since myth is a projection of the depth wisdom of the psyche, by participating in a ritual, participating in the myth, you are being, as it were, put in accord with that wisdom, which is the wisdom that is inherent within you anyhow. Your consciousness is being re-minded of the wisdom of your own life. I think ritual is terribly important.”

― Joseph Campbell

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“Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.”― Thich Nhat Hang, Stepping into Freedom: Rules of Monastic Practice for Novices

So many of the wise ones advise us to notice how our thoughts move in and out of our mind and that the act of noticing creates a space between ourselves, as a witness observer, and our thoughts, as the thing which is being observed. These wise ones grasp serenity, stillness and depth through practice and non-judgement.

If you just sit and observe, you will see how restless your mind is. If you try to calm it, it only makes it worse, but over time it does calm, and when it does, there’s room to hear more subtle things – that’s when your intuition starts to blossom and you start to see things more clearly and be in the present more. Your mind just slows down, and you see a tremendous expanse in the moment. You see so much more than you could see before. It’s a discipline; you have to practice it.”
― Walter Isaacson, Steve Jobs

Ritual holds this practice and is available anytime we wish to access it.

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